The Big Reveal

Yesterday was a milestone- I left the house, not to go to the doctor but a luncheon for work. It was my first time out of the house other than the doctors for anything and ....wait for it..... I was in a DRESS! Kind of a big deal, since I have nothing but elastic (or a bra) for the past 4 weeks. I really wanted to wear pants, but I have one last bulb in the lower area, so it was very uncomfortable when I tried them on. That in and of itself was a production.

I have been so excited to see what size I might be now and if any of my clothes fit (secretly hoping the answer was "no" so I could buy a new wardrobe). Well, it was 50/50. I dug deep, back into my closet where my clothes go to "retire". You know, we all have that section of clothes that we hang on to "just in case I lose a few pounds". I pulled out a few blouses and honestly, I was a bit disappointed. Other than the fact that they now fit more correctly in the chest area, they pretty much fit the same. After I thought about, it makes sense. I don't know why I was expecting my ribs and their "cushion" to magically shrink after the surgery. I have always been broader across the top, so everything basically fit the same.

I was pleasantly surprised when pants that I haven't worn in probably 6 or 7 years fit (and looked GOOD) !! Only problem was that darn JP drain. It hurt like a mother because the pants kept pushing it back "inside" and my body was like "Um. No. I don't want that back in here". I can't wait to try them on again next week, without pain involved. Bottom line, I dropped probably 3-4 pants sizes !!!! I looked at myself in the mirror and was amazed by my profile. I haven't looked that "slim" since before I had kids !! Bye-Bye "Mom-gut" !

However, it was a reminder that I need to work on my upper body. I am not sure how, but I need to do that. I think that I need to start easy, do some walking and eventually get into a more active routine. My goal is to get back into running. I used to "run" (ok, jog) back in the day and would love to get back into the habit. I always had some excuse why I couldn't exercise or make time, but now that the kids are almost at the age where they can stay home alone for 30 minutes or so I am kind of excited to get out on my own and have some "thinking time". So, I am putting it out there. Since I have been given this chance to 1. Save my life and protect me from future bad stuff and 2. Give me my figure back, I need to grab it and not get all chubby again. I have only lost a few pounds from the surgery since the surgeon basically played "Musical Fat" and just rearranged my tissue. The way that I am eating has also changed.

I am not a "big" eater. I am more of a snacker. Since the surgery, I am slowly getting my appetite back. However, the skin and my stomach are very tight feeling and when I am feeling full, I literally feel like I am going to burst. Everything feels really "jam packed" into my abdominal area. I am sure that the tightness will ease with time, but for now, It is borderline painful to eat or sneeze !

OK, focus Kelly. Lunch. Christmas Party. Work friends. I was really hoping to wear pants because they had the most dramatic effect, but I just couldn't do it. It was really uncomfortable. So, I chose a  flowy dress that I hadn't worn in about 2 years. I had never worn it to work, so it would look new to them :) I could tell the difference in the fit immediately and could see it in the mirror. Even my husband who is such a "man" commented and said I looked "great and beautiful" without being prompted ;) I have to admit, I was hoping for more of a reaction from my co-workers about how I looked. They all came over, sub-consciously looked at my boobs, gave me a hug, told me that I looked great, and asked how I was feeling. I guess I was hoping for "Oh my goodness, you look amazing" or " Look how thin you are !", but I have to just keep in mind that I really only showed off my top half and not the real difference-maker, so maybe when I wear pants, it will be more obvious. Next challenge- Family Christmas party. By that time, I will have my last drain out and I am wearing pants no matter what !!!!!