Plastic Surgeons Are Not All Created Equally

My sister had both of her surgeries done at the same time and raved about her plastic surgeon. Since I look to my sisters for advice and recommendations, I naturally thought that I was going to love this guy too and he would be the best for me too. So I made an appointment for the following week. I really wanted to get an idea of when the surgery was going to be and what implants were like :)I was actually looking forward to getting an idea of what the "new" me was going to be like.
When my husband and I arrived, I was kind of confused I guess. There was a zen/oriental vibe going on. Music in the background, herbs in the water fountain. It was definitely an upscale place and I felt a bit out of my comfort zone. My husband and I kept trading glances across the giant overstuffed couches we were sitting on. If there weren't other people waiting with us, I might have said "WTH is going on with this place ?".

I was called back and the doctor came in right away. He basically asked me why I was there. I explained my family history, he had worked on my sister, yada, yada, yada. He then again asked why I was going to do this when there were other options. What ? I felt very uncomfortable and didn't know what to say. This is a MAJOR decision that I made and was finally feeling good about and he was questioning it ? I almost started to cry (Ok. I did. A little. Did I mention that I am super emotional ?). He gave me a cute paper vesty thing to put on and left the room. My husband said, don't worry, if I don't like him, we can go see someone else. No, I was just taking this the wrong way. He is a top doctor and he must know what he is talking about. I'll get through this and it'll be fine.
He did the exam and said that he would do the surgery, but he would do both the removal of the breast tissue and the reconstruction at the same time. I really liked the surgeon that I had previously met with, so that bummed me a bit, but it made sense that he would want to do the whole surgery in order to keep the breast looking better in the end. Right ? He also mentioned that the best results were if we were to do a mastectomy and not do reconstruction right away. Leave me flat for about 6 months and use bras fillers. Another thing I was not ready for. Both my Mom and sister had gone straight to implants from their surgery. I don't want to be deformed for 6 months ! I know that the long-term results may look better, but that is a long time to go from being normal to breast-less to finally getting boobs again.

He said to think about it and get back with him. So my husband and I left talked a bit about it and decided that he is the leading plastic surgeon, so he must be the best. Besides, the other doctor that my surgeon recommended was trained by this guy and was my age. Surely he can't be as good. I thought that I would give my sister a call and get her take on him. She confirmed the vibe that I got from him. He was a very cold, no-nonsense kind of guy, but the best. He's not going to be your best friend and pat you on the back for deciding to do this surgery. She said that since she decided right away to go through with the surgeries, she needed someone like this to push her through it so that she didn't hesitate or change her mind. She said that he worked for her, but maybe he wouldn't be the best choice for me. She told me that I would have to go back and see the surgeon for many more appointments, so it was really important that I go to someone that I trusted and felt comfortable with.
While I know that this guy was "the best of the best", he made me feel like I was wasting his time. This is a major deal. This is my life ! I am not a waste of time and should not be treated like that. I deserve to have someone who makes me feel good about my decision and wants to work with me. I have made a few calls, but my insurance is pretty limited at this time. I am going to switch carriers after the new year and go to see the surgeon that my Mom and other sister are using. If I don't like him, I will see someone else. The moral of the story is you do not have to settle ! There is no law that says that you have to stay with the first doctor you see. If it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't. That's why they call it a second opinion.